Old School Reading That is Slabrat.

Mark Larkin...

Where have I heard that name before?

My thoughts as I give Javier his bath. As I wipe him dry, I realize Mark Larkin is a fictional character from a book: Slabrat by Ted Heller. I got so absorbed in the book, I thought these "people" are my friends that I have met a long time ago. Too bad they aren't real.

I've been reading since the last few days of 2013. Again, finally. I found time to pick up a book. And being a bibliophile, I started hoarding books again, just like I used to. Nothing new really, I usually just hoard stuff from Booksale. (Yup, Slabrat is actually 13 or 14 years old.) Great books at dirt cheap prices. Went home with six books the last time I raided the store, Slabrat being one of them. The things I love about Booksale are, aside from the huge price drops of books, they have branches almost everywhere and you'll never know what you can find in their stores. And if you do find one you fancy, I say BUY IT.

So this Mark Larkin guy isn't the main character in Slabrat. Zachary Post is. taking a break from "relationship-themed" novels, I pick up Slabrat in the hopes of finding a good laugh and getting a few lessons I could use in the office - whatever lesson that is. So far, Ted Heller has a good sense of humor. And the office politics in the plot, God it's outrageously funny. I try not to put the book down as much as I could. It's one of those books that's (in Leslie Usher-Soames' words) ack-she-lly GOOD.

As for the lessons, here are some: work your ass off and make sure it gets noticed by your boss or whoever is in the higher management that can set your career to the moon; co-workers can actually make a good set of friends, especially if you work beyond the 9-5 hour shift, they're probably the ones who can totally relate to your career problems, aside from your best friend, since, after all, they are in the same office; sleeping with co-workers may be a good idea at first, but just to be safe, never do two people at the same time (it's common sense, ack-she-lly) or at least tell/drop hints that you were involved with someone, rather than have everybody talk about your relationships (past and present) until it reaches your love/lust interests.

If this were a book review, I would say it's a pretty darn good book. But it's not a review. I'm just happy to be reading again a real book. I was forced to read an e-book before because I thought it was cheaper and convenient, to the point that I want to buy myself a Kobo. Sad to say, nothing beats a real book. I'm one to say "save the trees" when using too much paper but I'll be picking a paper book over an e-book any given day. It has a different feel to it, just like how I'm writing this first on a page on my notebook.

Things just make sense when I do them the way I learned how to do them.

I wish Zeke Post was around so I could ask him how his book review is going and talk about stuff other than rambling here on my blog.

Day 22, book #4.

SLABRAT

n. A person or 'rat' who works in an office block or 'slab'. Distinguishing features include gossiping mischievously, a predilection for office sex, a desire to do as little work as possible... and a desperation for promotion at any price.

Because Writing.

Yes, i keep around a notebook even though I'm a blogger. I may not be a legit writer with published books and articles for all the world to see. I may be writing things not even 1/10th if my friends care to read about.

Writing is my escape.

There are tons of things written in my journals, sketchpads, tissue paper that I will never say out loud. Because not everyone should hear or read them.

You've barely scratched the surface. Dig in, if you dare.

Confessions of a (Gym) Virgin.

Em texted me that a new gym opened near our place. She wants to sign up. And so inggitera me wanted in too.

By Friday afternoon I was inquiring for rates. I compared it with the one from my office. This one's much more near to my house and way cheaper than that. Yay for convenience. I texted my friends to join too.

Today is Sunday. Guess what? I went to the gym alone.

This is probably something I have to get used to. We're no longer kids who go to almost the same schools and had the same schedules. We're no longer doing the same things we did together ten years ago. So yes, I braved going to the gym alone.

Is this supposed to be a big deal?

For me, yes. It's my first time. Ever. To sign up for working out in a gym. I am familiar with a gym and probably the people who go there but this is the first time I'll be touching, using, the equipment all in the hope of losing weight, getting fit, toning my muscles, yada yada yada and all the other things they tell you when someone wants you to sign up. So here I am, fresh out of the gym, telling the world how I felt about going to the gym.

1. The gym is not scary. It might look like a place of mean, big, heavy things but they'll do no harm to you. I promise.
2. Trainers/fitness coaches are nicer than you think. Remember Jillian Michaels from the Biggest Loser reality TV series? No, she's only mean because she's pushing them to do things for their own good. But she has a soft heart too, and I think that's what makes her encouragement very sincere. Today, I met Chris, the trainer. Sure he was the typical buff, well built, I-have-muscles kind of guy, but he was nice. He is friendly towards the members and even takes a few minutes to get to know people. (Although I think this has something to do with marketing.) He is not mean, but he did make me do those crunches til my abs and thighs hurt.
3. The exercises may look easy, but that IS A LIE or a show. Before I did any routine, Chris showed me how to do them, because (1) I am a gym virgin and had no idea at all how to do anything there except run on the treadmill, (2) I can barely hear his instructions because the guy managing the playlist had the music on full blast, and (3) he might be showing off (yeah, I still think it's all marketing and showing the best this gym has to offer). What seemed really easy to Chris was fucking hard to do. He made me do lunges, and kept asking me to go lower, but I really can't. And crunches? Don't even get me started. Took me 3 rests to finish 10 counts. So yeah, the emotions we see on The Biggest Loser aren't acting - they're really hard and if you are that big, it is way, way, way too hard to do, and I'm only 15lbs over my ideal weight. Imagine how the contestants went through the training and exercises.
4. No pain, no gain. When I stopped for the 3rd time in the middle of my crunches, I wanted to cry. Because it was painful. I could hear my thighs and my tummy actually screaming at me to stop. But that was all in my mind. At the back of my mind a little voice was telling me that this is just for today. If I didn't finish the routine, I'm a wimp. If I didn't finish the routine, I won't lose that extra 15lbs. If I didn't do this today, what else can I do? This was something as easy as lifting my leg for a few seconds or minutes and I wanted to stop because I felt pain. So I listened to that little voice and finished the routine. This is just for today. (But I'll be honest that I really had a hard time going down the stairs because it was still painful post-workout.)
5. Gym selfies are not necessary. Well, for me at least. I was tempted to take a few shots of myself. But I stopped myself. First of all, I still have a few pictures of me enjoying the holidays. Then there are a few consecutive photos of food on my Instagram account which reminded me why I am overweight. So while this is a milestone in my life, I'm putting selfies on hold until I see results. Or maybe I'll take one next time I hit the gym, just so, you know, I could keep track of my progress.
6. Gyms are filled with guys. Cute guys. But be careful. That hot guy lifting weights next to you could be the next Wentworth Miller. Just because somebody's checking your ass while doing a routine on the twister doesn't mean they want you - they could probably be figuring out how to build up an ass like yours.

There. Those are the thoughts that raced through my mind before, during, and after the workout. Yep, I might have adult ADHD. These thoughts while working out? I don't know. Maybe because this is really new to me. Maybe because it's the first time I'm doing this. Maybe because I am both excited about it but the pain is just freakingly insane.

Either way, I know I'll be doing this again soon.

In Shape.

Yesterday, a co-worker asked me to join her and a few more people from work on a fun run. I'm planning to sign up for that. Really.

Today, a friend asked me to hit the gym with her. I went down to the gym and asked for their rate sheet. I'm gonna try and do a one-hour session next week. Then I'll decide if I want to sign up for a full year membership.

I feel like I have a lot on my plate. Do I?

Fish Cordon Bleu Dinner

If you're a solo parent like me, fast, easy and healthy meals are your choice dinners. I always thought those five-ingredient recipes are a joke. I honestly think there's always more than five ingredients to get things going. Or maybe I just like my food salty. LOL

I've been seeing a lot of health-related resolutions in the past few weeks. I don't know about you but I still haven't worked my ass to do any sort of exercise. If you call strolling in the mall for an hour or two or lugging around my work laptop in an airport for more than four hours exercise, then I'm in. Other than that, chasing Javier around has been my sole workout since 2014 started. So not to feel completely bad about that, I decided to start with eating healthy instead. You know, cutting back on the bad stuff, smaller portions on my plate, but yeah, I went to Cebu last week and I completely went berserk. (Read: awesome breakfast buffet with mean, crispy bacon.) Not to worry, I'm trying to get back on track.

A few days before the Cebu trip, I wrote down a few things I want to cook this year. Like I said, 2013 was the year I learned I can do it, this year, I'll be cooking more. Decent, healthy, magazine-worthy meals. Even if I have to learn everything by myself, from picking out fresh ingredients down to plating a piece of fish. So here's the first dish I experimented with. A real easy-peasy, with just five ingredients or less, anyone can do this and not worry about the calories piling up on your thighs. All you need is fish, a few slices of ham and some cream cheese. It can be prepared in less than 10 minutes and will cook well in a steamer. I used cream dory last night but I think this will work best if you use a sole or any other flat fish.


Fish Fillet Cordon Bleu 


1 kilo cream dory fillet (cut into 6 parts)
3 slices of sweet ham (divided into 2)
Half of a cream cheese bar, cut into 6 pieces
Spring onion, blanched
1 pack of Magi Magic Sarap (or you can just use salt and pepper to season the fish with)

Season the fish with 1 pack of Magic Sarap. Put in 1 slice of ham on each piece of fish. Place the cream cheese on top. Roll and tie with a piece of spring onion. Repeat with the other fillets. Steam for about 12 to 15 minutes.

I really have to work on my plating skills. And yes, that includes buying plates just because I feel like there are certain dishes that go with certain plates only. LOL. I apologize for the pictures. My camera broke and I'm stuck with my phone camera.

So who says healthy food is boring? Plus, it's so easy, you only need five ingredients to get it done. Steaming it makes it convenient for women or anyone else who has children or has some other thing to do. (Just make sure there's enough water in the steamer.) I'll buy one of those bamboo steamers next time - I just felt like the fillet looks better served in that than on a plate.


Here's to a healthy 2014. Enjoy!

Flying Solo.

It's been more than a decade since I traveled by air and I'm doing it alone this time.

A-L-O-N-E.

Well, I found out the last minute my co-worker is taking the same flight as mine but (to cut the long story short, I'm not in the mood right now to write about it) as unfortunate my plane ride adventure goes, I had to rebook to a later flight that day. So yeah, I had a few hours to spare in Manila and thankfully I have a book with me. My phone would have probably died if I relied on it to keep me sane.

Days (and nights) before the flight, I had enough emotions that I can't even distinguish them from one another. I was excited. I'm a bit anxious. I had a panic attack. I was hopeful. Until today, I can't tell how I felt. It bothered me that the first airplane ride I'll be taking again after 11 years will be a solo flight. My attention was split between packing and watching Javier play. It finally dawned on me that the "couple who blogged their trips together" idea someone injected in my head a few months ago is not happening today. Or at all.

I was scared too. For some reason, I even felt ashamed that in my twenty five years of existence, I haven't bothered to explore the Philippines as much as

A gloomy Cebu greeted me. Pfft. I knew I should have believed the weather predictions I found on the internet. Oh well. The arrival area is near empty. Outside, I could see just about 5 or 6 people with me waiting for their rides. I was tempted to get a cab because I have a feeling the shuttle service from the office will be taking a while to get to Mactan airport but then I remembered that airport taxis charge you an arm and a leg and that I was broke. Yes, I had the guts to go to Cebu on a near-empty wallet.

I packed lightly for this trip since it will only be two days. I could easily carry around everything and still jog. It felt like forever to wait for my ride and so my thoughts poured in, top of which is me feeling like I am not a Filipino. Sure, that moment, I look one and even had someone tell me directions in Bisaya. But it felt like I was in Hong Kong again. Standing there, waiting for your ride, refusing a cab ride just by shaking my head as I feared that talking would just open the gates of language barrier. Of course, people at the airport spoke Tagalog but it would be awkward if you can't answer them right away when they talk to you in Bisaya. So I just kept my mouth shut while waiting and my thoughts to myself. Even if I wanted to exclaim how I love the cool weather brought about the rain. (People have been warning me that Cebu is warmer than Manila - something I'm not excited about if I don't get to swim even for 5 minutes.)

My ride arrives and he speaks in Tagalog with an accent. 2 minutes of talking to him about weather, directions and why I arrived later than my co-worker, I found that his and the rest of the Cebuanos' punto (accent) I had talked to during my two-day stay was contagious. Great, I'm adapting.

The first night I spent dinner alone in my hotel room. Dinner was great, really. Balamban Liempo (I must have said Banilad Liempo a couple of times because one of our sites is located in Banilad, Mandaue) is probably the best, bang-for-your-buck liempo or roast pork belly I have ever had in my life - and I used to thrive on liempo when I was in college! Bought off the food court of Ayala Center and me itching to freshen up, I enjoyed my solo dinner in a hotel room in a city where I could only understand half of what people are talking about. Not my first time to eat alone, but it sort of left that uncomfortable feeling that I do not want to do this ever again. (But my photo shows how much I enjooooooyed dinner. Haha.)

I enjoyed my huuuuge bed (I requested for a queen size since there's no point getting twin beds if I'm going to have the room all by myself - this hotel has a view perfect for the sunrise by the way). But somehow, I got used to sleeping next to Javier for the past 20 or so months of our lives. Even if it means taking a break from his cries for milk or nightmares, I miss having someone next to me, whether a baby or a boyfriend.

The work environment made me feel home: the familiar interiors, Employee Communication announcements practically posted everywhere possible, and everything else that looked the same like in the other sites. Except that when I was attending to my tasks, it felt weird that I am not doing as much as the other employees. I felt like I am the new girl again. Plus maybe the fact that everyone is talking in Bisaya made me feel left out. It's not like in Pasay or Cainta where you can understand every single detail of a gossip. If I wanted to understand the whole conversation, I'd have to really look at people's facial expressions, gestures and their tone. It's like watching a Koreanovela, except live and with Filipinos in it.

The flight back home made me feel more alone. I made a list on my last night what things I'm supposed to buy before going to the airport. (And to minimize the chances of talking to the driver during the whole trip to the airport.) A co-worker was nice enough to accompany me in buying lechon. Although it felt awkward that the people from Rico's talked to me in Bisaya and I couldn't answer. I guess it made me feel dumb. After that, I bought (hoarded, actually) dried mangorind and otap at Shamrock. Thank God it was easy to point out which ones I wanted and that I am limited to just saying quantity, asking how much and thanking the ladies.

48 hours later and back in Manila, I had to get a cab for myself. No shuttle, no one to pick me up. It's kind of depressing not having someone welcome you home. But hey, I made it out on my own, I'm coming home on my own. I braved communicating with people I don't know and don't understand. I can push aside my frustrations in the worst moments of my life because there was no one else around to fix things for me. I managed to fit in. I appreciated the sun and rain more. I am now more careful, at the same time carefree. Flying solo may be scary. But now I like to be alone sometimes. Time to think, walking without rushing, me and only me. I'd travel alone again. I'd do this all over again. Except for the dinner alone in the hotel room thing.

I'll fly solo again. Because it's one of the things that remind me I'm more than how I see myself. And yes, I don't have to be afraid of being alone and broke.

Packing Chronicles

God.

I think I just grabbed on to clothes that are easy to fold and would endure getting squished in my bag. I haven't gotten myself a decent travel bag yet (one of my goals this year, btw) and since it's just a 48 hour trip, I'm doing my best to fit my stuff in an oversized bag.

I got my laptop backpack, an oversized bag and a tote for my shoes. Doesn't seem too much for a two day trip. I just have a problem with my shoes not being able to fit in my bag. So that adds up to my bag hunting goal.

I'll talk about my shoes in another blog. They're just gorgeous. Yeah, for 200 pesos, they are.

In my bag, you can find a pair of jeans, 2 button downs, a few pieces of sleepwear and a tankini - I'm hoping I could try out the hotel's pool, even for an hour.

Oh well. That's done. I hope I don't forget to pack something. Cebu is a different island after all.

Pucking Facking.

I hate packing. While I believe everyone has an OC DNA in their system one way or another, I am unfortunate not to be OC when it comes to fitting my life in a suitcase.

I have learned how to pack lightly though. Mainly because some of my trips now involve packing for an infant whose stuff takes up more space than my own. I have to cut back on my essentials just so I can still manage to walk around, with the bags, baby and all.

My office will be sending me to Cebu. For 48 hours. I am excited, really. I'll get to try authentic Cebu lechon anyway. What depresses me is the weather forecast. Says all over the internet it's either rainy or cloudy with scattered rain. Ugh. Not a fan of rain when travelling. Do you have any idea how bulky footwear is for rain weather? Another disappointment is missing Sinulog. I secretly wish they'd push me back 1 week but we're on a schedule.

Ugh.

This ranting should be enough. I have to start packing before Javier notices it.

Test

Blogerzoid

New Post.

Happy new year!

Let's say you're actually reading this now. I've long buried this blog due to laziness and for lack of things to write (or maybe, I really am just lazy to stop and jot down everything I want to say out loud). So if you've managed to drag yourself here (prolly because I sent you a link or forced you to read this because I want you to really read this), thank you for wasting time to read the ramblings you're about to see. This will be quick. I promise.

In my x years of writing, a new year post was a must. Well, it's still the same for this year but with remnants from a few bottles of liquor still flowing in my system. I usually just ramble about things I want to do for the rest of the year but not today - screw that. 2013 has been a good year, save for one heart ache, but all is well.

2013 was the year Patricia learned she can do it. 2014 will be the year she'll do it.

Sa lahat ng nagtyaga, nakasama at nananatili sa tabi ko, maraming salamat. Sa mga nawala at nangiwan, salamat na rin sa pagpapaalala na kaya ko kahit wala kayo. Sa suporta at walang sawang pagmamahal, maraming salamat at sana masuklian ko lahat ng kabaitan na naibahagi nyo. Sa mga bagong nakilala at naging bahagi ng buhay ko, sana magtagal ang kwento ng pagsasama natin. Sa mga nakalimot, nawa'y maging masaya kayo kung ano man ang dumarating sa buhay nyo ngayon, salamat sa panahon at sana ay magkita muli tayo. Sa mga taong nagpasaya, naggabay, at nagbahagi, pagpalain sana kayo. Sa mga taong nasakatan, salamat sa pagunawa at sa pagintindi at patawad sa mga taong hindi nabigyan ng halaga. Maraming salamat sa mga naging bahagi ng buhay ko, 2013 man o noon pa.



To the mistakes I made and the lessons I learned. To the love I got and to the battles I fought. To the wonders of firsts and the bittersweet endings of things I've held on to. To my Javier. To a better, wiser and happier 2014.


Cheers!
Patricia :)